


Care

by PolarKraken



Category: Original Work
Genre: Abduction, Age Regression/De-Aging, Emotional Baggage, Other, non human entity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-29
Updated: 2020-11-08
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:14:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,828
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27255517
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PolarKraken/pseuds/PolarKraken
Summary: An unsuspecting bowling alley manager finds himself in an otherwordly dimension.Multi-chapter, weird experimental thing.
Kudos: 4





	1. Waking Up

His mind was floating in this liminal space between wake and sleep. All he could feel was that he was very _very_ comfortable. Way too comfortable in fact. The duvet was just a bit too snug around him, the pillow under his head fitting his shape just a bit too well. It was so nice, that it was unsettling. Maybe he should open his eyes, to see what the hell was going on, but he was a bit hesitant to do so. Nevertheless, it was probably time to get up soon, so he may as well. 

He cracked his eyes open, the overlapping sleep blurring his vision, but even in this state he was able to make out that he wasn’t in his own bed. He sat up straight, his heart pounding fast, the duvet falling into his lap. He looked down and noticed that these weren’t his bedsheets. He usually went for classy dark linen, while the soft fabric he looked at now had some indiscernible pattern, too small for him to make out with his sleep drunken eyes in the gloomy half-darkness which surrounded him. 

To get rid of the gunk in his eyes he rubbed them and then blinked a few times. It was good he could finally see, but what he was seeing was a lot less good. It was bad in fact. Instead of the wall of his bedroom, covered with wrestling memorabilia and photos of his recent fishing trips there was pitch black darkness, only separated by a row of thick bars going all the way up and down as far as his eyes could see. He breathed faster, his hands grabbing the sheets on the soft surface he was lying on. It felt like a mattress, but it seemed to go on forever, as if someone had taken a single bed and stretched it five times in size. All around the circumference he could see the bars sticking out and even though he was panicking, he also just wanted to understand what was going on. 

He was trying to come up with an explanation. Was he in jail? Did he have a black out while drinking too much? It certainly didn’t look like any jail he’s ever been in and also, he hadn’t touched any alcohol for five years now, so all this was unlikely. Shakily, he tried to stand, but quickly gave up when he realized the mattress under him was too soft to walk on. Instead he was reduced to crawling and shuffling on his knees until he reached the edge of the mattress. He was reluctant to touch the bars, but when he finally did they lost a bit of their horror. They seemed to be made from smooth wood, with a circumference so wide, he couldn’t close his hands around them. He also tried to push himself through the gap between the bars, but quickly realized that his love handles prevented him from fitting through. Damned be his bad diet choices!

With a sigh he pulled himself back and landed on the soft surface under him. He was trapped and he didn’t even know where he was. His eyes darted back and forth, up and down, trying to make any sense of this surreal situation. And yes, while he was only able to see darkness around him, he was starting to make out faint shapes above him as well. He squinted, concentrating hard, hoping that any clue he could get would help him get out of here somehow. 

Slowly but surely he was able to see and all it did was give him more questions. It seemed there was some kind of artificial firmament above him, a stylized crescent moon with a kind face looking down at him, surrounded by stars and clouds, some of them adorned with little faces as well. The glow was not unlike the natural glow of the night sky he remembered from when he was out exploring in the fields during summer break. It was weirdly soothing to see something so innocent, even if he was even more puzzled than before.  
He crawled over to the other side of the mattress in the hopes of finding _something_ of help. He was so very on edge that he almost yelled out when he saw two eyes glinting at him. He bolted backwards and stumbled, his gaze fixated on the supposed threat and it took him way too long to realize that these eyes were merely artificial. The dim light slowly revealed a stuffed toy, almost bigger than himself and looking awfully familiar. 

“Mister Paws…?”

He mumbled and startled himself once again upon hearing his own voice in the indistinct quiet around him. It _was_ Mister Paws, his stuffed lion from his childhood, just a lot bigger, but he could make out the familiar scuff marks on his fur, the slightly lose right ear, the lopsided smile of his snout, as it was stitched on incorrectly. Why a bigger version of his favorite childhood toy was here, he didn’t know.

His surroundings, everything, the few hints he could gather until now, painted a rather confusing picture and he wasn’t able to make sense of any of it yet. He looked down and inspected his palms, patting along his own body, just to see if he was himself at least. 

In this 45 year old body in a plain white t-shirt and plaited boxers was still the mind of Rick McLayn, owner of the biggest bowling alley in the little town he had moved to from Chigago when Elly and him had gotten married. Their little Lily was supposed to experience a normal small town childhood, away from the dangers of the big city, with a happily married set of parents to look out for her. The lack of a wedding ring on his right hand was proof that this obviously didn’t work out. 

That’s right; that was his life, these were his actual problems. An estranged ex-wife, way too little time with his beautiful daughter, a thinning hairline and an expanding pant size, the stress of running his own business, the crashing fits of loneliness he would go through regularly, but would abstain from dealing with it in his in previous self-destructive ways. For her sake. Why did he have to put up with being trapped in this weird ominous place, all alone, where everything seemed way too big for him?

As he was still in a panicked state, he noticed quite quickly that something was changing. The light, as sparse as it was, would transform its hue, turning from a dark blue to a pale, almost pink color. He looked up and could see that the firmament drawing was changing. The friendly moon was disappearing to make way for some fluffy clouds, some of them with faces as well, gently floating on an orange sky. It would’ve been serene to watch if he knew what the fuck was going on. Things were changing and this probably wasn’t a good sign, so his panic picked up some more. He slipped under the heavy duvet again, thinking in childlike fear that this would protect him from whatever was lurking beyond his vision. He squeezed his eyes shut while he felt how the air around him got hotter and stuffier with each breath. He hated to be a sitting duck like that, be it in his normal life or here. He was a man of action, facing problems head on, but if there were no problems he could solve, he was lost. And that’s how he felt right now. Utterly alone, confused, vulnerable, it was hell. 

It took some minutes, but he finally had to poke his head out again in order to breathe and noticed how his surroundings were no longer black, but instead a hazy coral color, as if he was sitting in a misty field right when the sun was rising. 

And there was movement.

With a pretty undignified whimper he froze, watching the shadow coming closer. At least his fear had something to focus on now. His eyes were fixated on the figure, which came closer in long smooth motions and with each stride it took, he realized just how enormous it must be. There was no frame of reference for him to actually assess its height, but additionally to its shape he could also feel the tremors of heavy footsteps, giving away its sheer mass.

Slowly it moved close enough for its details to be visible through the mist around him and he gulped, holding his breathe while he was taking in the sight.

It was vaguely humanoid, but white all over and rather pear shaped with thick arms and an oval head with a face his mind had trouble processing. It was as if he was watching a TV with bad signal, or someone changing channels very quickly. The features would morph and disappear too quickly to pinpoint how it actually looked. He felt his limbs weaken as he was getting more and more disturbed by this. Sure, he would usually tackle his problems, but this… how was he supposed to tackle this? What would even happen to him?

At last, the creature was standing right behind the bars and looking up he could see that it was leaning down over him. He grabbed the duvet as he was blinking up, expecting the worst to happen and he knew this thing was watching him despite not being able to actually see its eyes. With a slow motion, both of its hands were suddenly coming down over him and he readied himself to be eaten or crushed. If this was how he was leaving this world, so be it. He just hoped Lily would be okay.

The warmth of the palms surrounding him would’ve been soothing in any other situation. Instead it just created a heavy disconnect with his internal fear and what was actually going on around him. He cowered under his arms while squeezing his eyes shut, as he felt how his body was getting picked up like a doll. Then something was being wrapped around him, something soft and smelling of fresh cotton. Then there was compression and warmth and he felt how something was brushing over his head repeatedly, messing up his dark hair even more. 

He dared to look again when he didn’t feel sharp teeth ripping him apart or pointy claws disemboweling him, just to see that he was wrapped in a soft blanket and being nuzzled in the crook of the creature’s arm. He glanced up, utterly confused, seeing the glitching, fading features of it above him and for some reason he was less afraid this time. 

“Wh-what’s going on…?”

He asked with a raspy voice and the being chuckled, yes _chuckled_ , as it kept on petting him. 

“All will be revealed, little one.”

A low voice sounded around him which his mind for some reason registered as female. 

He was still shivering, still very confused about all of this and not one iota wiser. 

“Are you gonna eat me?”

He inquired further and he could see the thing’s head shake no. 

“I would never dream of it, you’re under my care after all.”

Every sentence this creature spoke just caused more questions to arise in his mind. 

“Your… your care? What do you mean?? What is this, why am I here??”

He was getting impatient as his fear was subsiding. It didn’t seem to be malicious, but he couldn’t think of any other reason that would warrant him to be kidnapped to where ever _this_ was. 

“Patience was never your strong suit my dear. I will explain everything in time.”

The voice said, calm as ever while he felt it turn around to walk the way it had come. He strained his neck to be able to see behind it and gasped in shock when he saw what the prison he had been taken out of actually was. A giant crib.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on twitter under [@GenteiJanken](https://twitter.com/GenteiJanken)!


	2. Reluctant Healing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rick gains some insight into what is going on.

Rick was completely overwhelmed. It had been a while since he had been so out of control of his thoughts and emotions and he tried his best to sort himself out. He wasn’t in danger, but that didn’t change the fact that he was at the mercy of something he couldn’t even comprehend. It was still walking through the orange haze, which slowly changed more to a pale white, slightly cyan color and all he could do was squirm in its arm to try to make out anything else in this place. It was empty, however, nothing but fog and pale light and that thing carrying him. He noticed that he had been slightly cold before and the warmth which radiated from it was actually quite nice, as was the smell it was emitting. It was sweet and weirdly familiar, but he wasn’t able to tell what it reminded him of. Being carried around was humiliating to be quite frank, and he wished it would let him walk himself nonetheless. 

He was about to nag again when something suddenly did appear in front of them. It was some kind of chair and it was the size of an apartment building, according to the being’s proportions. It sighed and let itself elegantly glide into the seemingly soft material. Rick looked around curiously, but when he stretched out to touch the chair he was gently pulled back by that thing and wrapped up in the blanket again.

“I know you like to explore, little one, but for now you have to listen.”

He perked up. Would he finally get an explanation why he was carried around by this otherworldly being in this empty space?

“Cool cool, I listen. Just tell me what the fuck is going on here!”

His arms were wrapped in the blanket but he managed to pull them free. The being instantly tucked the fabric over him however. 

“My dear, no need to be so agitated.”

It started, petting him again and he begrudgingly let it happen. 

“My kin is in charge of looking after humankind. We observe you closely from our realm and when we see someone in need, we bring them to us to heal.”

He gulped and simply blinked confused. Well, that was certainly news to him, anyone looking out for humans, these rude, terrible pests which destroy anything they touch. It sounded unreal, as if he was having a fever dream, but while all this certainly looked like he was dreaming, he felt that all this was indeed real and his mind was able to run with all this madness somehow. 

He could ask the purpose of all this, but this wasn’t even the most pressing matter on his mind.

“Okay, but… why me? I’m sure there are loads of other people who’d need this way more than me.”

“Oh? Like who?”

The being asked, its ever phasing face leaning down over him. Rick was actually getting offended about this.

“I don’t know, maybe all the homeless people? The families who have to flee from war and famine? Kids with stage 3 cancer? I could go on!”

His thick eyebrows furrowed over his dark blue eyes while he frowned up at it. Honestly, his life wasn’t the best it could be, but even in his darkest moments he knew that he was really lucky to be where he was. 

Its free hand brushed over him slowly and its thumb rubbed over his right cheek as if to calm him down.

“Sadly, we can’t help with these kinds of problems. We are more here to soothe the souls of humans which were severely damaged due to very specific circumstances.”

Rick could just scoff at that. 

“Uuuuh, alright. But all this stuff would damage the souls of people as well, right? So why not them?”

He felt how the being pulled him up more towards its face to actually _nuzzle_ against him and it made him shut up instantly. What a weird thing to do while he was raging at it.

“You have a kind heart, little one. I’m glad I could choose you.”

This didn’t answer his question and he guessed it would never be answered. Instead he made sure to stay stoic until it stopped rubbing its face against him. 

“Th-thanks I guess…”

He mumbled and he heard the being giggle again.

“I’m very proud of you for being so concerned about others, but there is a reason _you_ are here right now.”

It stopped the nuzzling to look at him again with ever changing eyes.

“Yeah? What’s that?”

He answered, still very miffed about all this.

“While it is true, there are several strokes of fate which are far worse than what you endured, it doesn’t take away the damage which has been done to your very core at a very young age.”

He just sighed, shaking his head. 

“What are you even on about?”

The being seemed to contemplate, pausing for a moment, its unreal face turned towards him as if to regard him. 

“Sometimes… sometimes the things which haven’t been done to you are a lot worse than the things which happened.”

“You’re talking in riddles, man…”

He huffed, exasperated. What the hell was it talking about? He thought about his childhood, of all the good and bad things that happened, and nothing came to mind which would warrant pseudo-divine intervention. Sure, his dad had hit him with his belt when he acted up and he sometimes had to go to bed without dinner when his grades were going down, but otherwise his parents were decent people who had raised him to be independent and successful. There had been some bumps along the road, his alcoholism being one of them, but this was all in check, so… why?

“You will understand in time, little one. Just let me tell you this: I am able to see your soul, and it’s in a miserable state. It’s astonishing that you didn’t break yet. You must be very strong.”

He was getting pets again and he bit his lips, weirdly touched by these words. 

“You are here so you don’t have to be strong anymore. I will be taking care of you and you don’t have to worry about a thing. You’ll be here as long as you need to, until I can see that your soul has been restored.”

A new concern blossomed upon those words.

“Bu-but… I can’t just up and leave my life behind! People depend on me, I’ve got bills to pay, there’s-“

He got shushed by one of the massive fingers pressing against his lips. He was about to protest, when it answered.

“That’s why you’re in my realm, little one. Time works differently here. I plucked you out of your universe at a specific point in your space-time, and I’ll be able to put you right back, as if nothing has ever happened.”

The arm which was holding him pressed him tighter against the soft body of the creature and he felt himself relax, at least a little. Not that his feeble mind could understand what that thing was talking about anyway.

“Nobody on earth will know you were gone. Even if you stay here for a million years.”

The being let him some time to take it all in, cradling him gently in its arms, while it was swaying back and forth on its futuristic chair. 

“So… so is it like some kinda vacation then?”

He finally asked and the being laughed softly. 

“You could say that. All-inclusive.”

His last vacation had been ages ago, so the initial thought wasn’t even that bad, but still, there was reason for concern. 

“Am I really that messed up…? I don’t feel like it.”

He had left his insecurities in his thirties, after the divorce had been through and he had decided he would go along in his life on his own, with his family only at the periphery of his life and all the hot chicks he could flirt up as temporal bed partners. He had been in his life with both his feet on the ground, knew his worth, knew how to work hard and be a good boss and a good dad, albeit not a good husband. 

“Don’t be afraid my dear, it’s nothing we won’t be able to fix. Humans tend to get used to the pain they’re feeling, so you will see how relieved you’ll be once you’re healed.”

This all still seemed very scary, but he felt himself giving in already. It wasn’t like he had a choice after all. 

“Say… who’re you anyway? How should I call you?”

He finally said, looking up and he was sure the face was glitching less by now, enabling him to make some sort of eye contact with it. 

The being was still rocking back and forth, holding him protectively while it answered.

“For your time here, you can call me Mom.”

Rick felt his heart drop upon hearing this. It was like all the weird things around him, the puzzle he hadn’t been able to put together, snapped together to give a coherent picture. 

The crib he had woken up in complete with his old stuffed lion, the childish drawing of the sky above him, the fact that he was basically being swaddled and carried around…. Oooh, he didn’t like this one bit. 

“Hold on… just a minute…”

He began, the being patiently letting him collect his thoughts. 

“I don’t know if you noticed, but I’m a grown ass man. I know you said you’d ‘take care of me’ or whatever, but some things are really not necessary.”

“Are you saying you don’t feel comfortable being carried?”

It asked, squeezing him again and while, yes, his pride was very much protesting against this kind of treatment, something else inside of him was leaning into it. There was no way he would admit that, though.

“It’s not just that, also the bed I woke up in! Why can’t I have a normal one?”

“Hmmm, you’re smart, little one.”

It said and Rick simply looked up grimly. 

“Yeah, this whole toddler schtick. Let’s just stop that, okay?”

“I fear that’s not possible. It’s the entire reason you’re here after all.”

Its voice, as inhuman as it was, sounded clearly empathetic and understanding, but this just made it worse somehow. 

“Wh- But I’m not a kid!”

“Precisely, but…”

He felt the hug on him tighten again before it continued.

“I have to restore and refill some parts of your soul which were missed during your childhood. In order to do that, we’ll have to return to that stage of your life, at least figuratively.”

That sounded like some armchair therapy bullshit to him and he was about to rage, but it didn’t let him.

“You won’t like it at first and that’s normal. Your ego won’t let you. But with time and lots of love and patience, we will get there.”

It was standing up again, taking Rick with it in its arms. He was speechless and really didn’t like the prospect of the things coming.

“Think about it dear. No relationships to maintain, no bills to pay, no clothes to wash, no appointments to make, no food to prepare. You can just exist, here, right now, and everything will be taken care of.”

The being, “Mom”, was talking about all this as if these were bad things, which they weren’t! He loved to keep himself busy; supporting others, making sure people had a good time during their bowling tournaments. He had even learned how to prepare some of Lily’s favorite dishes, so he could cook for her when she had daddy-weekend. Getting all this stripped away from him seemed downright cruel and he already didn’t know how he would handle being so inactive. 

“You don’t want to miss these distractions, isn’t that right?”

It said and he simply crossed his arms in front of his chest, pouting while still being carried. A palm was gently cradling his head and body while he was lifted up, so he was hanging in its palms right in front of its face. He glanced at it quite nervously, the face a bit clearer than before smiling at him. 

“It will be scary, little one, but Mom is right here with you. It will be okay. For now, it is time to rest, however.”

With that he felt himself getting put back into the crib all this had started with and despite his protests, Mom was putting the duvet over him again, tucking him in properly and in the brighter light he could finally see that the sheets were printed with baby elephants, floating on balloons and clouds through a pastel blue sky. Just like his childhood sheets…

One warm palm stayed with him, gently holding him, one finger brushing over his head.

“You had to take in a lot. Sleep now.”

It said and even though he wanted to shout at it that he had _just_ woken up and wasn’t tired at all, he felt that it may be right. Fatigue was overcoming him, and being cuddled into these soft sheets, gently held by a giant benevolent creature did the rest. 

He never was one to get sleepy easily, so who knew what was going on to make him feel like this. He could only give in however, the burnout from this intense situation taking its toll.

He drifted off into dreamy slumber, his sub consciousness working through the new impressions he had gotten today.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on twitter under [@GenteiJanken](https://twitter.com/GenteiJanken)!


	3. Ego

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rick sees the damage and accepts the treatment. 
> 
> This is the last of the plot I'm comfortable to post, so thanks for checking it out so far!
> 
> Edit: Fixed the text, so it's only the newest chapter, oops.

“Great work with the batter, sweetie. Let’s add the strawberries next!”

Rick chirped while Lily was bouncing excitedly on her little stepstool he bought, so she could reach the countertop. A big bowl of pancake batter was sitting in front of her and she was covered over and over with little droplets from her vigorous mixing. 

“Oh man, that’s gonna be so _delish_!” 

She cheered, watching him add the chopped strawberries from his cutting board into the thick mixture.

“C’mon pumpkin, you godda keep mixing!”

He reminded her and she got right to it, the whisk easily incorporating the fruit into the batter. 

He watched her, having to look down on the little chestnut haired girl, who was gingerly helping him with breakfast and he smiled gently. Every second weekend wasn’t nearly enough time he could spend with her, but he made sure to cherish every minute of it. They only had a few more hours left till her mom would pick her up again, so he wanted to soak in as much quality time with her as possible. 

“Hey, how about you set the table while I cook up our feast?”

He asked and she looked up at him, pouting a bit. 

“But I wanna keep on cooking with you!”

She said, letting the whisk fall into the bowl and turning around. 

“Of course! You can come and help me once you’re done!”

Instead of answering, she was suddenly grabbing him around his waist and his mind reeled back from the breakfast preparations to his daughter’s upset. 

“Heey, what’s going on, sweetie?”

He asked carefully, but she didn’t say anything and just hid her face against his belly. 

_“Lily?”_

He whispered, just when he was opening his eyes. He was looking up and the colorful ceiling drawings were filling his vision. It indicated it was day, judging by the bright smiling sun, surrounded by birds and white clouds, but he had still been able to sleep. Too bad the very real experience of having a Sunday breakfast with his daughter just had been a dream, and waking up in the giant crib, surrounded by hazy fog, with an entity looming just somewhere out of sight was his new reality. He wondered what it had in store for him this time.

With a heavy sigh, he pulled his arm over his eyes, contemplating. Mom had already warned him that he wouldn’t like what was coming and judging by the fact that he was basically a prisoner without agency, doomed to be in the hands of an ivory giant just confirmed this. So far not much had happened, it only had carried him around some, soothed him some, _cuddled_ him some and it was surreal how small and helpless he felt here, especially contrasting this to how he it was in the dream. 

He had been the big one there, he had been her daddy, had taken care of her and told her how to help him, but here he was powerless, his existence had no meaning. There was despair creeping up at him while he rolled himself into a fetal position under the duvet with the happy little elephants on it. 

The fear of going mad was palpable and just when he had started to grip his head tighter to give himself over to sobbing, the duvet was gently pulled away and he blinked up at Mom’s face, still glitching as it ever had, but at least more or less distinct by now. Maybe his mind was just getting used to it.

“Awww, little one, what’s going on?”

It asked, weirdly echoing his own words he had just uttered in his dream. He sat up, turning his head away and frowning. 

“I don’t wanna be here…”

He said and could see the creature nodding in his periphery. 

“I know, but it’s for your own good. I wonder how I can convince you.”

He sighed and shook his head. 

“You can just put me back and not bother any further with me. I’m sure there are plenty of people who’re more willing to take your help and probably need it more as well.”

Just when he said this, he felt the palms scooping him up again and he could only sigh defeated and let Mom wrap him up once more. 

“Where’re you taking me now? The playpen?”

He snarked sarcastically and he only felt the entity squeeze him some. 

“You’re a visual learner, my dear. I think it’s best I show you.”

For some reason this made him nervous again, and the jaded bravado from before faded away into timid fidgeting. He really didn’t like what this place turned him into. 

“Sh-show me what?”

He squeaked and Mom answered without skipping a beat. 

“The damage.”

Its voice was somber and it made a cold shiver run through him. In the short time he had to be here he had never seen it so serious and it scared him.

“I… I don’t know if I wanna see this…”

Rick stammered and felt the arm press him gently.

“Nobody wants to see it, but sometimes it helps. In the long run.”

The answer was quite plain and he felt the need to instinctually huddle himself deeper into the blanket around him. It didn’t take long for them to arrive at a sort of console and he watched with big eyes, as the being used its free hand to swipe at it, not unlike in those futuristic films like Minority Report. This may be the most normal thing he had seen since he arrived here and he had to shake his head in disbelieve about it. 

“My kin can see human souls and my device here can visualize them for you. Now see here…”

It started, swiping a few times until a bright turquoise egg shaped mass appeared on screen, pulsing here and there and for some reason it was kind of intimidating to look at. 

“Can you guess what that is, dear?”

It asked, moving so he could see better. 

"Hmmnn, I don’t know. Probably a radioactive egg, right?"

Rick asked bitterly, already kind of done with all this. Mom seemed amused by this, even though he wasn't sure how he was able to tell.

"This is a visualization of a healthy human soul, just like my kin can perceive them. Tell me what you notice."

He was caught off guard, as he had already settled in to getting a lecture about the intricacies of soul shaping. Instead he leaned forward some to look at it more closely.

At first glance it had looked pretty uniform, but now that he dared to get a better look, he could see some darker areas on the smooth surface, even some dents and some spots which looked almost purple. It was also constantly changing and didn't have one solid shape, as if it was made from jelly.

"It's not perfect, is it?"

Mom asked and he nodded.

"Yeah, far from it. Aren't these damages bad?"

"Not at all."

One hand came down to pet him again which was kind of unsettling, as he had just noticed how agitated he had gotten from this already.

"A mature soul is supposed to be imperfect. Human souls are made to be shaped by the things around them. Therefore, they're very receptive and especially during childhood, impressions leave permanent marks on them. Now this here is a stable soul, as it gained a good foundation growing up."

It made sense in a weird way. He could guess that a nice childhood would make someone more resilient against the troubles of adult life.

"Bigger damages happening later can be more easily repaired, because this soul knows how to heal itself."

Rick sighed. He wondered if that thing made it so predictable on purpose.

"Let me guess: My soul looks nothing like that."

The glitching face above him stabilized for a short second, a serious look on its phasing features.

"See for yourself, dear."

It said calmly and then swiped again. He had never been that hesitant to look at a screen, not even while watching old bittersweet home movies. 

Mom was patient and didn't push him, only kept on petting him tenderly.

Slowly he turned his head to look, and his eyes widened upon seeing the flickering display before him. 

"Wh-why is it pink?"

He asked in shock and Mom answered.

"It represents the strain on your soul's fabric. Turquoise is ideal strain, while magenta shows too much tension."

His soul was magenta all over and anything but egg shaped. 

That's probably not good, is it...?"

He mumbled, one hand over his mouth while he tried to take it all in. 

"Nothing we can't repair."

The embrace around him tightened and he actually felt like crying right now. 

"Can you... Can you explain?"

He asked meekly and Mom complied instantly.

"The deformities you see are all areas where your soul wasn't nourished enough. Contrary to the healthy soul, yours lacks basic foundation to cope with the bigger and smaller problems in your life." 

It moved it's free hand to point at a specific detail.

"Can you see those strands connecting the different parts with each other?"

A gasp escaped him when he noticed that the whole thing was indeed fractured and not just deformed. Dim orange strand ran between them, clearly pulled taught like guitar strings. 

"The whole structure is held in place like this by your ego, keeping each fragment connected. But you can see it too, right? It's under a lot of stress."

His breath was shaking while he observed the screen, the way the orange strings were vibrating under the pressure, the way the different fragments pulsated almost like open wounds, especially the smaller ones which sometimes broke apart, only to be held together by a cocoon of orange. It would’ve been fascinating to look at, but knowing that he was looking at his soul and not a lava lamp just made it downright horrendous. He had to pull himself away from the hypnotic display and instead buried his face into the entity, the blanket slipping over him protectively. 

The massive hand came down again to hold him and then he was rocked back and forth, only a bit, but enough for him to notice. Then he felt Mom move again, but he decided to stay hidden. It was pathetic, but he was so far from caring right now. He had seen his messed up soul, literally in shambles, only held together by conscious force. No wonder he was exhausted so quickly every day.

How long he stayed hidden like this, he wasn’t able to tell, but his whole time perception in this place was messed up anyway, so it hardly fazed him. The grief about his inner turmoil was all encompassing and while he wasn’t able to cry, despite feeling the overwhelming need to, he still wouldn’t give up this little pocket of protection he was in, away from the cruel reality. He didn’t feel Mom moving anymore and would’ve been curious as to why under any other circumstance. 

“I’m sorry little one, but there was no other way for you to understand.”

The gentle voice above him said and it didn’t do anything to make him feel better.

“We can heal this, Ricky, but you have to let me.”

It needed a deep hearty sigh for him to be able to emerge from the blanket. Mom’s face was almost distinguishable right now, gentle features regarding him with such kindness he had never seen before. 

“I don’t…”

He ran both hands through his hair, licked his lips while he tried to regulate his breathing. Damn, it’s been a while since he had felt so upset. 

“I don’t even know what I have to do…”

Grabbing the blanket around him tighter he rolled himself up, staring down at the fabric folds. 

“It’s incredibly easy and incredibly hard at the same time. Maybe the hardest thing you’ve ever done.”

Rick didn’t answer and just kept on staring, so the being continued. 

“The only thing keeping me back from healing your soul are the orange strings you’ve just seen. We need to dissipate them.”

His head snapped up, staring at it in absolute horror.

“But then my soul will break apart!”

It was gross how whiny his voice sounded, but he figured he had every right to be whiny right now. It wasn’t every day that you found out that the very core of your being was basically nothing but poorly held together pieces of yourself. 

Before he could panic any further, he got hugged very tightly, one massive thumb gently brushing over his head while he was still hyperventilating.

“No it won’t, that’s why I’m here. You let go of the strings and I carry and protect your soul until it has healed.”

“What if something goes wrong…?”

He asked weakly, his face buried in the soft entity. 

“Nothing will go wrong. I promise.”

The panic would only slowly subside, but he managed to pull himself together after a long time. When he was able to vocalize again, he asked.

“So… I have to let go of my ego?”

“Precisely.”

One of his hands was up in his own hair again, streaking through it in a poor attempt to focus.

“You can probably guess, how we will do this, isn’t that right little one?”

It asked in a soothing tone and Rick tried his best to sort his thoughts out. He was only able to sigh. Of course he knew how, he wasn’t stupid, but this didn’t mean that it made him _very_ uncomfortable. But maybe, that was the point…?

“I don’t know if I can let you do this…”

He finally mumbled and Mom only cradled him gently for some time before it answered.

“My dear, you will see once you try, that it isn’t that hard. And you will see that it’s actually quite pleasant. You have to let me take care of you, so I can mend the damages in your soul. And the better your soul is healed, the easier it will get.”

There were so many objections to be made and questions to ask. He was in his forties for fuck’s sake, why did he have to resort to this kind of treatment? Surely, some psychotherapy would do the trick. But he knew himself, he knew he’d never let a shrink poke at his brain. It seemed this reluctance now got him to have an other-dimensional entity poke at his soul instead. 

A very undignified sound suddenly came from him, when his stomach started to growl loudly. He hadn’t even thought about consuming anything since he was overwhelmed with all these new impressions. It broke the tension of the moment and his hands came to hold his belly while he was looking down full of shame. 

Before he could apologize the entity cooed and petted him again. 

“Seems my little darling is hungry, huh?”

He nodded, feelings hot embarrassment spread across his cheeks. 

“Don’t worry, Mom will take care of that.”

It said gently and he looked up at it, nervous, afraid, maybe even a bit grateful and relieved, but mostly on edge. 

Th-thank you…”

He stuttered as he felt Mom move again, carrying him towards the start of a surely eye opening journey.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on twitter under [@GenteiJanken](https://twitter.com/GenteiJanken)!


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